My social phobia has been getting much worse recently. It is to the point where I don't want to leave the house if I know I will have to interact with people. Even interacting with people I know and like puts me into a state of anger and panic that makes life a trial. The underlying cause is my fear of people and the pain that they cause; no matter how much they care for me or I care for them.
I am at a lost on what to do about this. Cognitive therapy doesn't feel like it will work because my reactions are on such a subconscious level. There isn't anything wrong with my thinking; something happened that made me angry or sad and it is okay for me to feel that way. The problem is that feeling this way is isolating me from the people I care about and the rest of life.
I want to be able to interact with people but not sure how to get to that goal.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Blog Post 10
Enjoying my new nook even though the interface takes some getting used to. I am interested in seeing how it changes my reading habits. Someone mentioned that he has been reading more of the classics because they are free and easily available. The free samples will probably have a bigger effect.
I should be finished with the newest Lego Star Wars game in a couple of days, I hope. The biggest problem I had was one of my own making. To finish certain quests a particular character needs to be used and normally I would spend time wandering around trying to find this character but this morning I figured out that if I went to one of the control centers I could switch to what ever character I needed. The game is still a lot of fun and I will be sad when I am finished.
My mom is in the hospital again. She is having breathing problems and a general health failure.
Made chicken smothered in tapenade last night and it was very tasty but I should use less salt next time.
I should be finished with the newest Lego Star Wars game in a couple of days, I hope. The biggest problem I had was one of my own making. To finish certain quests a particular character needs to be used and normally I would spend time wandering around trying to find this character but this morning I figured out that if I went to one of the control centers I could switch to what ever character I needed. The game is still a lot of fun and I will be sad when I am finished.
My mom is in the hospital again. She is having breathing problems and a general health failure.
Made chicken smothered in tapenade last night and it was very tasty but I should use less salt next time.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Blog Post 9
Successfully fixed a toilet this weekend. The overflow tube had broken and needed replaced. The seat also needed replaced after I managed to break it. On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being hardest, I rank it as about a 3 on the difficulty scale. It would be higher if a person couldn't lift the toilet tank.
Started playing Lego Star Wars III. Unlike the other two games, this game is based on the animated television series instead of the movies. The story is less linear than any of the other Lego games. Each section of the story line is represented by a planet where episodes of the TV show took place. I haven't gotten very far yet but it I like it so far. Still to many games and not enough time.
Started playing Lego Star Wars III. Unlike the other two games, this game is based on the animated television series instead of the movies. The story is less linear than any of the other Lego games. Each section of the story line is represented by a planet where episodes of the TV show took place. I haven't gotten very far yet but it I like it so far. Still to many games and not enough time.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Blog Post 8
I made it back from my annual retreat with my friends. Everything went well except for the earthquake in Japan which put a mild damper on things and the absence of Alex which put a bigger damper on things. I won more games than normal and had a very good time.
Tried to fix my toilet this weekend and failed. The overflow tub is what is leaking not the flush mechanism. I get to tear the whole thing apart again. I am over whelmed with joy. At least I get to put the tank on straight this time.
Tried to fix my toilet this weekend and failed. The overflow tub is what is leaking not the flush mechanism. I get to tear the whole thing apart again. I am over whelmed with joy. At least I get to put the tank on straight this time.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
American Idol, The Cave Singers and All Songs Considered - Music Post 1
I have been sucked into watching American Idol yet again and last night was the first night of the men singing in the main contest. Twelve guys sang and the top 5 vote getters go through. Luckily only 5 of them were any good. Another good thing was that only one was really bad and that was caused more by song choice than any thing else. Everyone else was just a big pile of meh.
My favorite was Casey Abrams doing I Put a Spell on You. Does not have the vocal ability of most of the other contestants but seems to know what his strengths are and plays within them. And he looks like someone I would be friends with.
Only other person I will talk about is James Durbin. You Got Another Think Coming was his song choice. Before this performance he has been relying on the ability to hit a very high finishing note. His performance still had some of that but he was very much in control. And it was great to hear Priest on American Idol.
KCRW's Song of the day is Swim Club by The Cave Singers. It's mid-tempo county/folk sounding acoustic song. This only sound seems to be the new thing which is okay by me. Listened to it twice and it was very nice. It didn't feel overly precious which this style of music seems to drift into more often and not.
All songs considered recently talked about the music of the 90s. Most everything they talked about was good but everything they played was very mid-tempo and unoffensive. The songs they picked were good but it really bothers me that there seems to be a bias against anything with a harder edge.
My favorite was Casey Abrams doing I Put a Spell on You. Does not have the vocal ability of most of the other contestants but seems to know what his strengths are and plays within them. And he looks like someone I would be friends with.
Only other person I will talk about is James Durbin. You Got Another Think Coming was his song choice. Before this performance he has been relying on the ability to hit a very high finishing note. His performance still had some of that but he was very much in control. And it was great to hear Priest on American Idol.
KCRW's Song of the day is Swim Club by The Cave Singers. It's mid-tempo county/folk sounding acoustic song. This only sound seems to be the new thing which is okay by me. Listened to it twice and it was very nice. It didn't feel overly precious which this style of music seems to drift into more often and not.
All songs considered recently talked about the music of the 90s. Most everything they talked about was good but everything they played was very mid-tempo and unoffensive. The songs they picked were good but it really bothers me that there seems to be a bias against anything with a harder edge.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Blog Post 7
It's harder to do this regularly than you would think.
Discovered that not only are we feeding a couple outside cats but a raccoon as well. I don't know who was more surprised when I came outside. The cat food comes in after dark unless I am watching one of the cats eat because I don't want to encourage the bad behavior by the raccoon or make him an easy traget for someone that wants to do him harm.
Michelle and I have started cooking our new slow cooker. The first thing we discovered is that while tasty the slow cooker recipes from America's Test Kitchen are not quick to set up. Both the soup and stew we made had prep times of over an hour. We're going to keep working on it.
Managed to blow away a good portion of my digitalized music last week. I don't think I lost anything I purchased but it's still annoying.
Get to head up to Seattle in less that a week. yah.
Discovered that not only are we feeding a couple outside cats but a raccoon as well. I don't know who was more surprised when I came outside. The cat food comes in after dark unless I am watching one of the cats eat because I don't want to encourage the bad behavior by the raccoon or make him an easy traget for someone that wants to do him harm.
Michelle and I have started cooking our new slow cooker. The first thing we discovered is that while tasty the slow cooker recipes from America's Test Kitchen are not quick to set up. Both the soup and stew we made had prep times of over an hour. We're going to keep working on it.
Managed to blow away a good portion of my digitalized music last week. I don't think I lost anything I purchased but it's still annoying.
Get to head up to Seattle in less that a week. yah.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Blog Post 6
Walked for 3.4 miles at lunch today and I am hoping to do a couple of more after work.
Finished up a class on pattern making for soft home furnishings at Sew L.A. last night. I almost finished a dust cover for my rice cooker. We were supposed to make covers for our sewing machines but Michelle was doing that and I don't have a stand mixer. I made some mistakes in my pattern; one piece was longer than the other. And I it took me three tries to sew a curve and I have problems remembering to put the presser foot down. Time to start practicing.
Took Meeko to the vet this morning which she hates. We have to keep giving her ear drops and she is putting on weight which are both good things. The worst part is that we have to keep giving her lysine and she she won't eat it mixed into wet food. I'll have to try it in peanut butter because I hate pinning her down and shoving it into her mouth.
Finished up a class on pattern making for soft home furnishings at Sew L.A. last night. I almost finished a dust cover for my rice cooker. We were supposed to make covers for our sewing machines but Michelle was doing that and I don't have a stand mixer. I made some mistakes in my pattern; one piece was longer than the other. And I it took me three tries to sew a curve and I have problems remembering to put the presser foot down. Time to start practicing.
Took Meeko to the vet this morning which she hates. We have to keep giving her ear drops and she is putting on weight which are both good things. The worst part is that we have to keep giving her lysine and she she won't eat it mixed into wet food. I'll have to try it in peanut butter because I hate pinning her down and shoving it into her mouth.
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